FUCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!! Why the hell is he jumping in my fantasy?
Bunny and I were doing just fine; I have new batteries, a new bottle of KY and this mofo pops up...again...DAYUM!!!! When he showed up last week, I shook it off. When he showed up on Monday, it made me pause. And now tonight, for the 3rd time in a row, he has invaded my orgasms...what is going on?
It has been almost two years to the day since I finally broke it off with him...for good...no going back...no communication...no phone sex...no hotels...nothing. Why is he in my head?
We were crazy about each other. We had passion, love and friendship. We talked about spending our lives together. We could just never get our timing right. When he was available, I was seeing someone or when I was involved, he was available. We were never available for each other at the same time.
At first I was beginning my career and he was still in school. Then he wanted me to move with him and I decided to stay and focus on my career. Once I had become a bit more settled, he was seeing someone. When he again asked me to go away with him, I was seeing someone. This patten kept going for years until he sealed the deal with another woman.
Throughout our years together, we took amicable breaks, had painful break-ups and always found our ways back to each other...even during his marriage. He was in pharmaceutical sales, so we would meet around the country. The passion never waned; the friendship didn't falter and my love stayed true.
Even when we weren't together, we were together. We had phone sex at least twice a week and long conversations, discussions and arguments about everything under the sun. We often joked that we would make a truly horrible couple because we would've killed each other with our opinions and sarcasm.
Finally in September 2008, I said good-bye and let him go forever. I promised myself I wouldn't call, text or email him, and I didn't. He called a few times, on my birthday and around the holidays, eventually he stopped when he realized I wouldn't respond.
Letting him go was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. If there is such a thing as soul mates, then he was mine.
Why is he all of a sudden making appearances when I masturbate? It's not like I don't have others to "get me there." I even called out his name this last time, which was not good...though it was the best orgasm I've had in a LONG time.
I can't have him in my head, my pussy or on my lips. I'm not that strong...FUCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!
I remember when we first met, he thought I was a snob and I thought he was a thug...at least I was wrong LOL.
1 comment:
LOL! First of all, thanks for posting this right here. Second, with me being a man, I can't call a reason 'why'... I do know is that cats like me take advantage of women when they are in this kind of situation. We DO know that this happens to y'all and it is a matter of timing and recognition when it comes to 'catching' y'all at the right time.
Anywho, I have my own dilemma to figure out... I have fallen into a rut of celibacy, and I don't know if I can get up!! I need the sexual version of MediAlert!!
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