Monday, April 6, 2009

To vibrate or not to vibrate that is the question

This is an IM chat I had with a friend of mine last week:

Me: while penetration is good, it's only part of sexual experience for most women

Him: most?

Me: there's foreplay, feeling a man on you, cuddling, the smell/touch/taste of a man

Him:
oh okay

Me:
yes, I know several woman who don't climax during penetration, do so during oral or anal sex

Him:
i have never met a woman who didnt climax from vaginal sex.
i heard they're out there
my heart goes out to them

Me:
yes, they are, I know white & Black women who don't get it vaginally

Him:
it's mental
the key is unlocking it
which starts way before u get down sexually

Me:
true, once I learned that, it was on

Him:
there are instances where u can just bang the bottom outta dem drawz
but it truly is a mental affair

Me:
yes, that would be on way of putting it LOL
B4 I invested in my vibrator collection, I used to be able to climax w/o touching myself
I remember talking to frnd & she was amazed by that, it seemed normal to me

Him:
how do u do that?

Me:
I've always found touching myself to be distracting if I'm alone
arms aren't long enuff LOL

Him:
and here i am thinking i helped.
u dont need me(n)
or any man

Me:
like I said, "BEFORE"

Him:
damn vibrator "collection"

Me:
now, I'm spoiled, need vibrator

Him:
i've destroyed many a vibrator in my day.

Me:
"and here i am thinking i helped. u dont need me(n)" I always want/need you
Y so violent, Y destroy??????????
is that really necessary

Him:
they didnt belong
i loathe them
they create a false sense of reality
i once had an "adult toy store" for a client

Me:
LOL

Him:
and the owner broke down the whole physiological aspect of "vibrators" specifically

Me:
it ain't that deep

Him:
and how they infiltrate the mental harmony that control pleasures

Me:
"infiltrate"

Him:
i knew women who wanted to incorporate it into lovemaking. "it'll be fun"
no, me inside u will be fun.
me inside u will be magic
me + vibrator is overkill.
some things are just meant 2 be analog

Me:
yes, this is one area where "IRL" is 99% always better

Brothas, do you share his feelings about vibrators?
Sistas, have you encountered similar situations/opinions?

8 comments:

Babz Rawls Ivy said...

I have heard there are men who are are annoyed about sex toys. My husband introduced me to toys...he thought I would like them...he was right! Now that I am divorced and have not had sex in 2 years and with the AIDS crisis affecting Black women in America at rates that rival that of some places in Africa...I am sticking with my toys!

Peter Clare said...

Great question. I do not share his views. My position is if it works for her I'm for it. Your chat partner seemed quite concerned with himself and not so much w/ the woman. By the way, is a bullet considered a vibrator? They seem to have a greater effect than a "regular" vibrator.

Monique said...

Sounds like the guy was totally focused on himself and his needs and that of bringing the woman pleasure, the way you were certainly about everyone benefiting.

I for one am all for toys. I think they bring a certain spark to a sexual experience and encourage you to be more intuned with yourself.

ChpterReads said...

I Like my toys and I think he should like my toys too.. They are a way of getting things started and spicing up the play time. And if used correctly it can make it fun for the both of us at the same time. Your chat homey has to learn to embrace the toy and see it as an ally instead of an adversary.

Tha BossMack TopSoil said...

Igot a box fulla shit for bitches.

Shannon said...

Thanks for comments & keep 'em coming. I will certainly share them with him.

Anonymous said...

I'm female & don't like electronics or toys. I'm a purist - if it's not a live throbbing hot penis pulsating I don't want it in me. Everythang ain't for everybody. We all have to discover what works for us & find happy mediums w/ our partners.

The Second Sixty-Eight said...

I got no problem with toys unless the keep me from getting mine!